No night sweats. No relief. Then the workers showed up very early this morning. The fumes hit me by 7. Most of us are feeling like prisoners. No elevator today. And now, no front door.

I threaded through the workers and took my garbage outside to the dumpster. I sat in my power chair, out in the cold and talked to a few people. We are used to having lots of inside common spaces.

When I tried to come in, the manager asked if I could use the emergency exit on my end of the building. I showed him how difficult it is to reach the laser that reads our key fobs that open the front door. I asked if the box could be extended further out. With the things that hold my feet in my power chair hitting the wall, it’s about two feet longer than my reach to swipe the fob. THEN, it takes major maneuvering to get through the second door. So….I turn around and go back outside and to the emergency exit. By that time a rain/snow mix was coming down hard.

It was physically impossible for me to both open the emergency door AND get through it. There is no outside handle. Luckily the manager came down the hallway to let another chair user out, so he let me in. I couldn’t fit because there was a 55 gallon drum restricting the width of the hallway. I burst into tears.

The manager caught up with me as I was unlocking my apartment door. He told me it was OK to cry :-p I said that being disabled sucked!!!!! Stupid asthma and sickness from all the chemicals in the air, plus all the physical barriers. To top it off, the upstairs neighbor who stomps so hard that things fall in my apartment, is home today. He said he knew, and he had once again told her to stop it.

At that moment I felt sooooooo trapped and forlorn! I suppose you would have to be me to understand. I am still crying hours later, I was already extra sick and weak before the remodeling nightmare started. Not happy right now.

I have been doubling my water consumption, hoping it would mitigate the poison in the air. I also had the windows open most of the day. I was really surprised to find the temperature went up to 50 today. It was sure cold before noon!

This time I was home when my pharmacy delivery came. Poor guy. I opened the door and almost fell on him. I was soooo dizzy! Then I realized it was the same guy who tried to catch me last time. He was again all worried and ready to call. 911. I told him not to worry…I had been dizzy like this for days. He seriously wanted to call somebody. Later I realized DUH! All the chemicals when I open the door only makes me worse.

Geeze! Just now my lungs seized up while trying to inhale. I quick opened my windows back up. My wing is totally blocked off 😮

One of my newest neighbors from the other end of the hall came out, too. She says she also has COPD like me and is struggling to breathe. It must be the white stuff they are putting down.

The carpet is being replaced by what management calls “planking”. It’s very thin and bendy. Must be something plastic-y. I predict even more slip and falls.

My ears ache and my gums are numb. VERY tired of feeling like crap.