When I woke up this morning, I seriously thought about calling 911. I could barely move or breathe. My ribs on both sides were in crushing pain. I almost passed out on the toilet. My vision was coming and going and I was swaying around uncontrollably. I wanted to barf, but I did not have enough strength. An hour later, I am only doing slightly better. My counselor will be here in a couple of hours, so it’s not a good time to call a doc. It will be interesting to see if I get better by then. I feel sooooooooooo sick 😦

I spent the whole day feeling awful. Each time I stand up, I get worse pain and am very SOB. My ribs are going nuts. As if that wasn’t bad enough, my colon to vagina fistula has been hurting almost more than I could deal with. And I am bleeding because of it 😦 And….my blood sugar is really high, despite eating hardly any carbs for the last couple of days.

I sounded bad when my counselor got here. He said I improved while he was here. That’s because I LOVE TO talk…..even when my voice is broken 🙂 We had a fun time discussing the world’s problems. After he left, I stood up and cried. It was like morning all over again 😦

Wouldn’t you know it? My doc won’t be in the office on Friday. Only another week until my neurologist appointment. At least I know that if I get so bad that I need another IVIg….he will fight my insurance company to get it. At least he will try.

I did not take a valium last night and I don’t think I need one tonight. The hip/butt/spine still hurts, but it’s no longer mind bending pain. Now it’s just tear my hair out pain :-p

The secret to life is that God is in charge. He knows us, he loves us. The world is a mess. No matter what happens, things will work out. Eternity is going to be better than mortality. We need to do all we can do here and rely on the grace of God for the rest.

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