I have been making stupider and stupider mistakes. At 3 PM I was in such bad shape, I didn’t know what to do. My vision had almost disappeared, the elephant on my chest wasn’t budging and my head was screaming inside. That’s when I realized I had never taken my morning medicine and it was time for my afternoon dose.

My morning has been spent in my not so comfy chair….looking out the window. It’s the same old obnoxious people, doing the same old obnoxious things. I have never even seen many of the people who live in this building, yet the same old dirty dozen people go back and forth smoking, cussing, screaming, shouting, letting their dogs poop under my window, etc……

It’s day 2 of the guy who just got out of jail. It’s pretty obvious he has anger issues, impulse control issues and certainly issues with his general demeanor. They stuck him in prison for months, here he is again, but even angrier. Great job prison system! Every time he walks by, he does something that makes me jump. A lot. His eyes are wild.

The van owner has been driving around with the banned guy. At one point, someone must have yelled at her. She whipped the van out of the lot and parked it next to the parking garage. Later, she came back with him, again! I saw him running across the lot. He sprinted over to the fence, squeezed between the rails, and took off.

After 5, I went out to get my mail. My voice was totally broken. People started talking to me. I struggled through an hour of talking until I was ready to collapse. When I can’t talk, I can’t breathe very well. All of the sudden, I felt all of my facial muscles tighten up. They went from super drooped to normal feeling. My throat felt different. I could talk!!! I ended up going outside and talking for another hour! It was rather nice in the shade, under a tree.

Except for the last 2 days, I have not socialized much in a long time. The stories I heard! People that seemed mostly OK are also druggies. Lots of sex going on. There were details about Sally’s death.

Nobody had seen Sally for 24+ hours. Sally hated the resident assistant, so that women went and got an 80 year old woman and sent her in. The poor woman! She found Sally dead on the floor. She’s the person who talked to me for the first hour. She had nightmares and could not sleep last night. She’s a very nice and sensitive woman. She always hugs and kisses me. Today she told me that when my neighbor would ask me all the time if I was going to die today, because she wanted Olive….the kind woman would go back to her apartment and cry 😦 I feel bad about that. I feel really bad she has been traumatized by that and finding Sally dead. Sigh….

Remember the stomper? She doesn’t exactly live here any more. She moved months ago….but she is always here. I hear over and over that when she is here, her and the guy do nothing but fight. They stay at each other’s places and love/hate each other. Both have been involved in all sorts of drama and numerous police calls. Now there’s a new twist. Last night there was an altercation between the newly released convict and the stomper’s boyfriend. A crowd formed. The stomper’s guy brandished a gun. Police were called. I sure can tell it has been full moon time!

The guy in my hallway who smokes spice and went to rehab and then went back to drugs, was hauled off in an ambulance and has been kicked out for drug use. What I don’t understand is why several of the worst druggies are still here???

So I get back to my apartment….and guess what I find! The van is parked directly in front of and between my 2 windows. The husband found his wife in bed with the homeless druggy…in his own apartment. He was napping in one room and the wife and creep were in another. Then he found her sleeping with the guy in the van. He took the plates off the van. The husband is leaving. The wife wants to bring in the homeless druggy to live here 😮

I remember why I like staying in my apartment by myself! The outside world is infinitely worse than what I thought. I closed my windows and shut the blinds tight. I have seen way too much in the last couple of days 😦