Each day I have intense experiences with people. I know it’s not an accident. I have been given the gift of hyperness and my voice back, thanks to steroids. After the morning news, it looked like a gorgeous day out there. I had to go out! The hard part is remembering where I am going from minute to minute. My brain is more of a sieve than ever.
I had to repeat over and over…haircut, Trader Joe’s. I made it to both 🙂 It sure wasn’t as easy as that sounds. Every couple of blocks, I would forget. Just like every other time, the tables and chairs at Cafe Rio were blocking the only sidewalk I can take to get my hair cut. I moved at least 4 chairs. Maybe 3 minutes later, once I was inside, my left eye slammed shut. Well…..duh! My MG is predictable, but my brain forgets that.
The woman who cuts my hair is quite a character. I like her 🙂 We joked around, but she kept pressing me for more info on my health. I told her she didn’t want to know. I told her about my last ER visit and the doc signing me up for hospice. She could not stop sobbing. Great big tears were pouring down her face 😦 I felt so guilty. I kept telling her all the good things about being closer to the end of life. She says she has 2 favorite people that she does hair for and I am one of them. Everything made her cry harder 😮 Gosh, I never cried that much for me!
I told her I thought we each meet the people we need to meet and that I hoped I was useful in getting her to understand that transitioning from one realm of existence to another is a good thing. Bodies wear out. I told her what I told my kid. When I’m on the other side of the veil, I can somehow help people still on this side. I promised her I would try. She wants some postcards from there 🙂
Honestly, I was shocked at how deeply this woman felt about me. I like most people and spend my time with them laughing and joking around. I gather not everyone is so friendly. My inability to tell people apart has it’s good and bad aspects. I never recognize her when I first come through the door…only after she calls me by name and does some talking, do I realize who she is. I’m nice to everybody….especially those who exude niceness back. I don’t need to know who they are…..but it would be a lot less embarrassing!!!
Then I went to Trader Joe’s because I was having the crisis of no ice cream. It has definitely become my main food group with swallowing so difficult and all the gut pain. I also got 2 bananas…my favorite breakfast.
On the way home I took some pictures. Today was one of those perfect days in the 70’s, with blue sky and a nice breeze. When I got home, I instantly got stuffed up again. I only stayed long enough to test my blood sugar, pet Olive and go back out. I had no destination in mind, other than OUT. As I rounded the back corner of the building, Sam said hi. I turned around, got up on the sidewalk and parked next to him.
Sam had lots on his mind. He wanted to talk about God and Christ. We spent at least an hour in intense, but pleasant conversation. I always like listening to his stories. He has a fantastic ability to turn Bible facts into intricate stories. I love to listen to the Old Testament stories, because few people go there. Sam has been a preacher much of his 70+ years. It seems like we always have gotten into discussions of religion and spirituality the last 4 years.
Today he told me things he said he has never shared with anyone else in this building. We have had soooooooo many dovetailing thoughts and experiences in our lives! He talked about death, so I told him about me. He looked stunned…but not in the way you might expect. He said he wondered why he had been telling me all those things. He was now sure that God had directed him to. He also was sure that the holy spirit had caused me to come sit by him.
Then he said God had moved us to talk and would probably prompt us when to leave. At that exact moment, his phone rang. I said that was my sign right there 🙂 I was going back to my apartment and got right to the front door when 2 men said my name. The sun was in my eyes and I did not know who they were. When I saw the parts to my wheelchair in one guy’s hands, I figured they were from the wheelchair company. It took me several minutes to realize the tall one was the guy who got me the new power chair.
I always recognize him eventually because he has a form of dysphonia, so we have that in common. I had no clue who the man was next to him. They wanted to put the parts on my chair, so we went to my apartment. Earlier in the day, I had written to dysphonia-man to complain it had been well over a month since the wheelchair broke….and what the heck was going on? After a while, the other man told me he had been here before, but I had been very sick that day. I had no glimmer of remembrance or recognition.
Now, 4 hours later I think I know what day that was. My phone had woken me up, so I buried it, but whoever it was kept calling back. Then there was a knock at the door. I was in bed without clothes and was groggy as all heck. I ignored the door. When they came back again and knocked real loud, I finally got dressed and opened the darn door. It was those 2 guys. Of course, even now, I have no recollection of what was said or why they were here.
Sooooooo….I think he must be some sort of big deal in the company. I showed him all the stupid things wrong with the new chair. He asked me to be patient and he promised to get me a better foot system and arm rests. They took back the leg thingies. YES! I hope this does not take another month. I will trust them for now.
When they were done with me, I was still restless and antsy. I went back outside and took pics of the smoking area where people get together. At least half of us out there at any one time are not smokers. Soon, I was surrounded in people and pets. I talked until my voice gave out and my lips had turned into dried out, cracked prunes. I came in the building with every intention of going to my apartment…but then I saw Gordon and my favorite old guy. They both had tons to tell me.
Buster’s heart had slowed to 30-something beats a minute, so he had gone to the VA and had a pacemaker put in. He’s at least 80, maybe 90? I kept telling him how much pinker his skin looked! He was pretty excited to feel better 🙂 Gordon was in tough shape because his back keeps going out. We talked about all sorts of things until I was about ready to slump onto the floor. I finally came home, shot up insulins and had ice cream and berries 🙂
Now I am right back to where I was. Every breath hurts a heck of a lot. There is no place on my body that does not hurt. I am MG weak all over. Thanks to the extra steroids, I was real energetic today. It’s only right this minute that I realized what happened. My pill bottle had 8 of the small Medrol pills….but I took the 32 mg pill, too. No wonder I had so much strength and endurance! Well, it was fun while it lasted 🙂 I’m sure I will pay for it tomorrow.