My hand cramps are similar to these pics I found

The chills started at exactly 10:10 PM Saturday night. For an hour or so before that, I kept getting the sort of hand cramps that feel like they are going to break my hand. When I lived with Heather, I would start yelling OW, OW, OW, OW, and she would know to come running and flatten my hand. It’s really, really hard to do myself. For a few days now I have been getting those cramps. OMG! I hate them 😦 What’s weird is that cold often brings them on. I don’t yet feel cold when these start lately….but eventually the chills start.

I fell asleep pretty quick, but was soon in the agony of half awake, half asleep chills. I was dreaming in static pictures…like looking at a newspaper. Over and over and over, certain pics popped up that illustrated my chills. It was maddening. I was using my foot against the wall to move my whole body. Then I would do this shiver shimmy the length of me. Sometimes I bounced up and down on the bed. I could not wake up and I could not warm up. My muscles seized, my teeth clenched. Every once in a while, Olive would run in meowing and walk all over me. She was freaked out. It seemed like this went on for hours. I was finally able to wake up and it had only been 2.5 hours. If a dead body with rigor mortis could feel, it must feel like this.


I turned the heat up to 90 and have been sitting here for an hour. My muscles are only getting more locked up 😦 This is torture! Too bad heat is not the cure for chills 😦 I’m sitting here in a hot room, covered in roving goosebumps. The teeth clenching thing is awful. I cannot stop it. All my muscles clench up.

I don’t know what time I went back to bed. I went through hours more of alternating fever and chills. It was horrible. I didn’t wake up until 11:30 AM. I feel worse than ever. The chills are not going away. I am very weak and shaky all over. I am also thinking that I should probably be getting better medical care. It’s always hard to know when to go to the ER. It feels like the pneumonia is coming back…if it ever left. My lungs feel like they are on fire….stinging fire.

The missionaries were here after church. I was embarrassingly wimpy and weepy. I am more like a wild animal than part of civilization. The worse I feel, the more I want to be alone. It’s because it’s just too hard to breathe and/or talk. All my energy is needed to breathe. It hurts to hear voices or noise. Light pierces my skull. Movement hurts my eyeballs and head. Everything overwhelms me. Being this sick really sucks 😦

1:50 PM. The chills are back in full force. I have the heat back on at 90 degrees. 5 PM and I have the window wide open and the fan on me. I am starting to suspect a kidney stone and/or infection. I’m getting wicked sharp back pains in the kidney area. I’ve had these problems in my distant past, so I know what they feel like 😦 It’s 6 PM. I wish I knew what to do! I think it’s raining out and it’s getting dark. Sigh….. 7 PM and I am wondering if there is a difference between the pain at the bottom of my right lung and the sharp kidney area pain? Same thing? Related? Different? I am soaked in sweat. Half an hour later and sweat is pouring down me in rivulets. Hard to believe I have ever had chills. That probably means they are next 😦 My head is pounding.

Uh, oh….at 8:30 PM, I stood up and discovered I was soaked…and so was my chair. Within moments, the first goosebumps started. Soon, my muscles started seizing up. Next, I will be enduring more chills. Not looking forward to day 3 of my own personal Groundhog Day. I keep asking how much more I can take?!?!?! I don’t really want to find out.